16 Aug HOW TO HAVE A THREESOME
A good threesome is actually fairly hard to pull off. Usually one person is pressured into it, which will cause one couple to sort of go off on their own. A third wheel situation. But hope isn’t lost. Great ménage à trois can happen, and here are the ways to make sure the circumstances are always in your favor.
1. With a lady friend
Your girlfriend might have had a successful experiment or two in college or might just be up for it. That’s the easiest way. If she’s not into it, trying to pressure her into sleeping with someone won’t make things any better. Gotta hope she’s up for it.
2. Online options
AshleyMadison.com was created specifically so people can sneak around. And as creepy as Craigslist can be, with the right vetting process (and a fake email account specifically for your threesome desires) you can find a willing third party.
3. Friendly, but not too friendly
If you’re not into strangers, an acquaintance will do. But not someone you (or her) see on a regular basis. Someone you’re willing to go out with, since alcohol will surely be involved and they should be fun. Have your girl bring it up since women are far more trusting of each other when it comes to sexual first impressions. And if you play it right you’ll come off as mysterious.
4. On your own
Surprisingly, it was Sex and the City that best showed us that the best way to enjoy a threesome was to be the third.
5. You and two ladies
What you’ll need: a million dollars, luck, or an impressive resume to satisfy those suspicious Craigslist ads. This can be done, but you have to be as patient as a fisherman. Your chance will come when two ladies, after enough gin and tonics, will slowly let out their inner desires for each other and you’ll be right in the middle so they won’t feel awkward about their developing lesbian habits. Just roll with it.
6. You and another couple
Alcohol. No eye contact. Keep aware of who is where at all times and you’re good to go.